The greatest reality t.v. trailer ever.

Here is a "sizzle reel" for the upcoming Food Network reality competition  show "Extreme Chef." A sizzle reel is apparently like a trailer, except much longer and based on this one more XTREME!

You don't need to watch the whole thing, in fact please don't watch all 3 minutes of this, but be sure to at least watch from 1:10 to 1:20, where two blond childern react to a chef with expressions that are Xtremely staged. This is then followed immediately by one of the Chef's wandering out of a random homeowner's pool for no discernible reason.



Note that the guy wandering soaking wet out of the pool is not addressed at all. That segment was about them having to barrow ingredients from the neighbors, did this neighbor store all of his produce at the bottom of his pool for some reason? Maybe there was a fridge at the bottom of his pool?

In conclusion, all reality shows should involve the host exclaiming "Go milk your cows!" with the same bravado that Russel Crowe said, "At my signal, unleash hell!" at the beginning of Gladiator.

via Warming Glow

Pringles makes everyother ad on earth now better by comparison

I think the worst commercial I saw this year up until now in terms of a money spent to suck ratio was that Dodge commercial during the Super Bowl who message was: Women suck so buy a really loud car. This ad was so obnoxious and insulting in its attempt to appeal to the mentality of a regular Joe American, that I assume it was actually an satire, or Dodge trying to win some sort of sick bet by trying to prove false the old adage, "nobody ever went broke by underestimating the public's intelligence."

But today we have a new winner of the prestigious "Strictly Commercials' Award for Worst Advertisement By a Company Valued At Over 25 Billions Dollars Award." Called the SCAFWABACVAO2BDA for short.

The coveted whoopie cousin shaped trophy that accompanies this honor goes to...
Proctor and Gamble

For the recent Pringles Banner from their company. (Pringles is owned by Procter & Gamble, which itself is a subsidiary of the Shineheart Wig Corporation.) Here is the ad reprinted below. I apologize in advance for giving it this opportunity to molest your eyes.



Everything about this ad is unspeakably awful. the product itself is called "Pringles Xtreme." I thought everyone on earth agreed about 5 years ago that calling products "Extreme" to try to appeal to young people was idiotic and would only result in snickers, but here is Pringles fighting the good fight to keep that cliche alive.

Also the product isn't just extreme. its Xtreme. Its so too extreme to star with a wussy letter like E, its so extreme it must start with an X to show its intense extremosity.

All I'm gonna say about the person that have pictured in the ad, is that I have honestly never wanted to punch a product model in the face more than I want to punch that guy in an effort to wipe that smug expression off his face. And hair haircut is only intensifying my hatred.

These Aren't Your Dads Puns! They are Turbopuns!

This a ridiculously amazing ad parody from an internet Canadian sketch comedy group called Picnicface. It makes fun of extreme energy drinks using a fictional one called Power Thirst. They should have hired these guys to try to make Power Bar Juicy Gummi Bears appealing, though as I said in the previous post, no one could have succeeded at that.



This is perhaps the best parody of ads that try to be "extreme!" since the Mountain Dew swilling extreme jerks in Harold and Kumar go to White Castle (Extreme in store kayaking! Extreme cashier!). In fact I will be so bold as to say that this ad is in even funnier than the extreme guy characters in Harold and Kumar. Because here at Strictly Commercials were aren't afraid to take tough stands on the big issues, especially when they are issues that I myself just made up, and that no one has ever discussed before, or will ever discuss again.

[source for the PowerThirst ad parody]