Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Clint Eastwood's 2 minute Chrysler Super Bowl Ad

I mostly wrote this entry so I could have an excuse to post this incredibly
sexy photo of young Clint Eastwood.

Every thirty second spot in the Super Bowl this year cost a record 3.5 million dollars. So Chrysler spent 14 million dollars to have their two minute "It's Halftime in America" ad air.



The shots of Eastwood are compelling, and having him do voice over up until the last line is an effective climax. Eastwood is one of my favorite actors, and  I thought he lent tons of gravitas to the hokey script.

However, I thought the whole "Half Time in America" conceit didn't quite work. The footage of the every day works was compelling, but the script was way below the level of the cinematography. The lines about Detroit almost failing and people being out of jobs were a bit to matter of fact to me, wikipedia level writing instead of the type of rhetoric that would have better suited the way the ad was constructed.

The imported from Detroit slogan has been Chrysler's slogan for over a year now, but they should have kept it off the end of this ad. It worked in the Eminem ad last year since it was about how Detroit is a funky fresh city, but I don't think it works in this ad about how America is trying to get back on its feet. The whole "Imported from Detroit" idea, at least to me, is that Chrysler is able to make cars that rival the popular imports from Japan and Germany. This ad had nothing to do with cars, let alone build quality so the slogan is not relevant.

If anything this ad is back pedaling from the idea that Chrysler can build cars which are as good as the imports.

Besides my problems with the script of the ad being a few drafts away from being as meaningful and profound as the ad hopes it is, I think this is a terrible ad from a "selling a product" stand point.

I get that Chrysler is trying to align their struggles to the struggles of the average American and create warm feelings toward the brand through this. I personally don't think this works to sell anything, let alone an investment as serious and financially large as a car.

Detroit automakers spent from the 1970's onward building cars that were increasingly inferior in build quality and design to their German, Japanese, and now Korean counterparts.

This ad, unlike last year's, say absolutely nothing about Chrysler now building better cars than their terrible cars from before the bailout. I personally think the only car Chrysler is currently producing that has an iota of cool design is the new taillights on the Charger.

I obviously don't know the thought process behind this ad, but perhaps the truth is that Chrysler realizes their cars are still ugly and years behind the competition in terms of technology, which is why they showed maybe 3 seconds of cars in this two minute ad, and spent the rest of the ad trying to get you, the average American, to associate yourself with Chrysler. I don't think it worked. Even if it had me be get all bleary eyed and gotten  I don't think trying to convince people to buy inferior American cars out of patriotism will ever be a successful business model.

This rant is almost over I promise, but I just wanted to conclude by pointing out
1. The Chrysler 300 is not assembled in the U.S, it is assembled in Canadian factories out of parts made in Asia in order to save money. The Kia Sportage along with many other German and Japanese cars are assembled in modern plants in the southern United States, providing hundreds of jobs.
There is a pretty interesting article from the Christian Science Monitor in which they discuss these plants and interview workers there about the Detroit bailout. Read it here.
2. The majority owner in Chrysler at this time is Fiat, a company which is based in Italy which you may recognize as not being in America. I have nothing against foreign car companies, I just find it funny that the whole point of this ad was that Chrysler somehow feels the pain of the unemployed American because they are a Detroit car company, but 58 percent of them is in fact, not an American car company.


This is not to say that I don't think you can make an ad that successfully addresses the automotive bailout. Or that using ads to  give folks a warm feeling about your company does not ever work. Coke's "Life tastes good" slogan was one of my favorites, and those ads, I thought successfully associate Coca-Cola with good times.

GM made a brilliant ad a few years back with acknowledged the bailout and thanked America for saving it. It did so in a much more clever way than Chysler:



I think this ad is great. It came only around six months after the bailout, and unlike the Chysler ad, its message was "thank you." The GM ads since then have been about how cool their cars are, rather than trying to guilt you into buying one.

Sometimes new GM has had goofy ads about how their new compact car is so hip that it goes sky diving, but even that ad is a lot more effective than the Chrysler ad, since it actually features a car in it.

LMFAO Half Time bud light ad

Someday I hope to throw a giant inflatable zebra into a mosh pit.
Though I cannot hope to look anywhere near as cool as Redfoo does while doing it.
As I've mentioned a few times before on this blog* I think LMFAO are awesome, their songs are catchy their videos are funny, their concerts have a giant crowd surfing inflatable zebra and they just seem like fun dudes.


So any ad which features there music is okay in my book, especially when it involves hamsters dancing to it.

Needless to say I was pretty excited they got to do a Bud Light Super Bowl ad:




The ad is pretty inconsequential but was funny. I would have preferred to see them develop it into a series of ads, where LMFAO preforms at the bar and slowly wins over the patrons, like the awesome cowboy bar scene in blue brothers. ("What Kind a music do you guys have play in here normally?" "We have both kinds. ...Country & Western." )

 I'm especially glad the cardboard robot got to be in it. That dude is the best robot since B-9, the robot from "Lost in Space".

footnote(s):

Past three articles which include LMFAO linked on highlighted words, see all 3 articles as their own combined page here.

First photo of Zebra, Redfoo and Skyblue via Billboard
Second photo of Zebra via Indy Star

Review of Romeo and Juliet The Porno on ItsNotThatWeird.com

Picture Unrelated


A while back I did an article on sex in Newport Ciggarette ads for the awesome sex blog ItsNotThatWeird.com. I just wrote another article for them reviewing the Porn Parody of Romeo and Juliet which was released today by Dream Zone Productions.




Clint Eastwood's 2 minute Chrysler Super Bowl Ad

I mostly wrote this entry so I could have an excuse to post this incredibly
sexy photo of young Clint Eastwood.

Every thirty second spot in the Super Bowl this year cost a record 3.5 million dollars. So Chrysler spent 14 million dollars to have their two minute "It's Halftime in America" ad air.




The shots of Eastwood are compelling, and having him do voice over up until the last line is an effective climax. Eastwood is one of my favorite actors, and  I thought he lent tons of gravitas to the hokey script.

However, I thought the whole "Half Time in America" conceit didn't quite work. The footage of the every day works was compelling, but the script was way below the level of the cinematography. The lines about Detroit almost failing and people being out of jobs were a bit to matter of fact to me, wikipedia level writing instead of the type of rhetoric that would have better suited the way the ad was constructed.

The imported from Detroit slogan has been Chrysler's slogan for over a year now, but they should have kept it off the end of this ad. It worked in the Eminem ad last year since it was about how Detroit is a funky fresh city, but I don't think it works in this ad about how America is trying to get back on its feet. The whole "Imported from Detroit" idea, at least to me, is that Chrysler is able to make cars that rival the popular imports from Japan and Germany. This ad had nothing to do with cars, let alone build quality so the slogan is not relevant.

If anything this ad is back pedaling from the idea that Chrysler can build cars which are as good as the imports.

Besides my problems with the script of the ad being a few drafts away from being as meaningful and profound as the ad hopes it is, I think this is a terrible ad from a "selling a product" stand point.

I get that Chrysler is trying to align their struggles to the struggles of the average American and create warm feelings toward the brand through this. I personally don't think this works to sell anything, let alone an investment as serious and financially large as a car.

Detroit automakers spent from the 1970's onward building cars that were increasingly inferior in build quality and design to their German, Japanese, and now Korean counterparts.

This ad, unlike last year's, say absolutely nothing about Chrysler now building better cars than their terrible cars from before the bailout. I personally think the only car Chrysler is currently producing that has an iota of cool design is the new taillights on the Charger.

I obviously don't know the thought process behind this ad, but perhaps the truth is that Chrysler realizes their cars are still ugly and years behind the competition in terms of technology, which is why they showed maybe 3 seconds of cars in this two minute ad, and spent the rest of the ad trying to get you, the average American, to associate yourself with Chrysler. I don't think it worked. Even if it had me be get all bleary eyed and gotten  I don't think trying to convince people to buy inferior American cars out of patriotism will ever be a successful business model.

This rant is almost over I promise, but I just wanted to conclude by pointing out
1. The Chrysler 300 is not assembled in the U.S, it is assembled in Canadian factories out of parts made in Asia in order to save money. The Kia Sportage along with many other German and Japanese cars are assembled in modern plants in the southern United States, providing hundreds of jobs.
There is a pretty interesting article from the Christian Science Monitor in which they discuss these plants and interview workers there about the Detroit bailout. Read it here.
2. The majority owner in Chrysler at this time is Fiat, a company which is based in Italy which you may recognize as not being in America. I have nothing against foreign car companies, I just find it funny that the whole point of this ad was that Chrysler somehow feels the pain of the unemployed American because they are a Detroit car company, but 58 percent of them is in fact, not an American car company.


This is not to say that I don't think you can make an ad that successfully addresses the automotive bailout. Or that using ads to  give folks a warm feeling about your company does not ever work. Coke's "Life tastes good" slogan was one of my favorites, and those ads, I thought successfully associate Coca-Cola with good times.

GM made a brilliant ad a few years back with acknowledged the bailout and thanked America for saving it. It did so in a much more clever way than Chysler:



I think this ad is great. It came only around six months after the bailout, and unlike the Chysler ad, its message was "thank you." The GM ads since then have been about how cool their cars are, rather than trying to guilt you into buying one.

Sometimes new GM has had goofy ads about how their new compact car is so hip that it goes sky diving, but even that ad is a lot more effective than the Chrysler ad, since it actually features a car in it.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

A Brief History of the Bud Bowls (updated)


Since Super Bowl XLVI is upon us, I am reposting my "History of the Bud Bowl" article which I wrote for the Super Bowl last year. Its still awesome, except now it has way fewer typos.

Hopefully there won't be any ads during this Super Bowl which miss the mark as much as the "Fuck off Tibet" GroupOn ad from last year. You can read all my posts about that ad, the backlash, the campaign's cancelation, and why writer Sean O'Neal at the Onion AV Club is a pretentious douche-canoe, here. (The articles are listed newest first, so scroll to bottom to read the first one.)

Speaking of bone-headed Super Bowl ads, I can pretty much guarantee their won't be any ads as racist or terrible as the SalesGenie.com ads which ran four years ago during the previous Giants versus Patriots Super Bowl. (They are number six on this Cracked.com list of racist ads if you want to read more about them.)

Below read my "History of the Bud Bowl" article from Super Bowl 2011, which was voted the best thing to happen relating to Super Bowl XLV, besides every single thing involving my Green Bay Packers. (In a poll conducted by the magazine Bud Bowl and Green Bay Packers News Only, Quarterly.)

Despite the Packers' struggles in the winter, they are still my pick for winning Super Bowl XLVI, just as how my pick for the best actor Oscar every year is that "Clint Eastwood will show up on stage with a .44 Mangum and take the Oscar," regardless of who is actually nominated.


I miss the days of Budweiser daring to make one long multipart ad with a story arc that ran through all four quarters of the game. Gone are the days of Louie the Lizard trying to assassinate the Budweiser frogs to take their place as the official Bud spokes-creature.

As near as I can tell by doing as little research as possible, the first ad series of this type for Budweiser was the Bud Bowl in 1989. This ran during Super Bowl XXIII, and proved to be such a huge hit that Bud made a new series of Bud Bowl ads for every Superbowl until 1996. (On a random note, the 1996 Super Bowl was actually the last Super Bowl won by my Green Bay Packers. UPDATE: until tonight. Yippie Kay Yay!)

I now present for your Super Bowl Sunday viewing pleasure, the full set of ads for Bud Bowls I through VII.

Bud Bowl I

Here is the full Bud Bowl I, the ad series that started it all.



According to the website Dead Spin, the ad agency that wrote the script for the Bud Bowl toyed with the idea of having the final seconds of the Bud Bowl be cut off by a clip of the TV movie Heidi, which would have apparently been a reference to a November 17, 1968 AFL game between the Jets and the Oakland Raiders. The game was running a few minutes long and the Jets were winning with a 32-29 score and 65 seconds left in the game. NBC, proving that they were run by morons long before they fired Conan, decided to end their coverage of the game and go on with the regularly scheduled program that was supposed to follow the game, a new made for TV movie about the children's story Heidi. While all NBC East Coast viewers saw the first minute of Heidi bounding through the fields, the Raiders scored 14 points and won the game 43 to 32. This game went on to be called the Heidi game or Heidi Bowl.

In terms of what was actually seen during the ad, as you saw, Budweiser beat Bud Light 27 to 24. Would Bud Light be able to beat their rival and win Bud Bowl II?


Bud Bowl II



So, nope, Bud Light didn't win. Bud Light: Great taste, less filling,* but apparently shitty at football.



Bud Bowl III

Here's how it went down in Bud Bowl III:



Holy crap! Bud Light won! This one is significant for being the last Bud Bowl to feature the awesome looking stop motion beer bottles playing football. And also for having appearances by Bud Ice and Bud Dry, two beverages that by all accounts tasted terrible. Bud Ice was significant though for their "Beware of the Penguins" ad campaign, which I loved as a kid.



Bud Bowl IV: 
The Phantom Menace 

Perhaps getting sick of how expensive and time consuming it was to do the intricate (but super awesome) stop motion sequences for the on field action, Bud Bowl IV featured almost no on field action of the beers playing football. And the few clips they use look like they might be recycled clips from previous years.

Instead it was promoting a prize give away contest Budweiser was having that you could win by buying their beer. As you can see below, (but, really, don't bother watching it), the ad shows some dip-shit trying to retrieve his winning ticket from a pigeon who stole it. This is somehow even stupider than it sounds. You could watch the compilation of the two minutes worth of ads about this that Bud subjected to the Super Bowl viewing public below, but I'm not sure why you would want to.



Screw this guy and his pigeon and his haircut.



Bud Bowl V

Bud Bowl V fortunately brought back the format of two groups of beer bottles wearing helmets playing football. The company decided to go with computer graphics to make the beer bottles move instead of stop motion.



I think the computer models they used lacked the charm of the stop motion sequences from years past. However, they used the new technology for some very clever gags. Also, it is cool to see humans interacting with the bottle players. Despite my nostalgia for the stop motion, I'm actually in favor of the new graphics for the bottles. They did a lot of interesting things with them and they look way better than you would think CGI from 1992 would, (the commercial aired in Jan 1993 so it was made using 1992 technology).

Also cool about this commercial is the fact that the two Bud teams are coached by football great Joe Namath and star of the film Major League Corbin Bernsen.



Bud Bowl VI




In Bud Bowl VI, Mike Ditka is one of the coaches, and anything with Ditka in it is cooler than the same thing without him in it. The gag of Ditka listening to music on his headphones instead of talking to the assistant coaches is pretty great.

 This game was significant for being the last multipart Bud Bowl and the first time a can of beer had been a player in the game. And also for having a guy about a minute into the above video yell with way too much enthusiasm, "Hey! Turn it up! It's the BUD BOWL!!!!" I hope the actor who said that line so excitedly is related to the actor in Back to the Future II who says, "I think he took his wallet" way more times than necessary and with such gusto.



Bud Bowl VII: 
The advertising equivalent of Budweiser sending all of America a text containing Brett Favre's penis.

Bud Bowl VII sounds idiotic, and I can't find a video of it anywhere. Here is a description from the great website Mental_Floss:

"Anheuser-Busch probably should’ve sent its bottles to the recycling plant after Bud Bowl VI. Instead, they gave us 60 seconds of Iggy, Biff, and Frank, castaways who watched Bud Bowl VII unfold from a desert island. With Bud trailing late in the game, Iggy was transported off the island and into the game, where he caught a pass and began rumbling toward the end zone. Eighty yards later, following a dream-like montage of press clippings and cereal boxes commemorating his newfound celebrity, Iggy gave Bud its fifth Bud Bowl win."

Mental_Floss also has a rundown of all the previous Bud Bowls Here.


Bud Bowl VIII: 
The Bud Bowl is Dead, Long Live the Bud Bowl

There was no Bud Bowl in 1996, as I previously mentioned, but they brought it back for a one off spot in 1997 that I again can't find online but which again sounds stupid based on the Mental Floss description:

'After a one-year hiatus, Bud Bowl VIII returned with another single, forgettable spot. Howie Long and Ronnie Lott provided coverage, holding Fox Sports microphones no less, from a bar in the Louisana bayou. After a fan stole his microphone and opened a fridge to reveal the Bud Bowl in action, Lott threw him out of a bar window and into a swamp. Lott proceeded to reveal the final score before the spot ended with a familiar refrain from the fan, who was sharing space in the swamp with an alligator: “I love you, man.”'



So after its awesome beginnings, the final two Bud Bowls ended the series not with a bang but a whimper. Kind of like how Budweiser has slowly been made with cheaper and cheaper ingredients over the years, until today, where the second most prevalent ingredient in Budweiser is rice, really. (Rice is much cheaper than wheat which is why it is used. Bud has lately been doing ads promoting the fact that its beer is made of rice and claiming that the rice makes it taste awesome, which is pretty ridiculous, and akin to if Kraft's Velveeta cheese ads said that milk protein concentrate makes their "Pasteurized Prepared Cheese Product" taste way better than actual cheese made from actual milk.)


Footnote(s)
*That may have been Miller Lite's 90's motto, not Bud Light's, now that I think about it. Either way both those light beers taste like rain water filtered through a jock strap.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

The 1980's distilled into concentrate

I was trying to watch either filmed version of Sleuth (1972 or 2007) with Michael Caine, and discovered neither is on netflix's streaming. The films of Sir Caine they did have included one I had never heard of called "Blame it on Rio" which appears to be one of those sex comedies like "10" which seem to have only been made in the 80's.

You know the kind I'm talking about. They tended to play on HBO a lot in the 1990's since they had pretty big name actors in them but also boobs, which served to remind the viewer why HBO was worth the extra cash.

The Trailer for "Rio" pretty much epitomizes every 80's mid-brow comedy movie cliche:



Despite it looking very much paint-by-numbers, I'll still probably give the first 20 minutes or so of this a go, Look for an update here if I feel strongly about it one way or the other.

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Podcast Episode 47


Thor's 47: How to cook the Food of the Gods (biscuits)
official site still waiting to rock your ass at HourOfThunder.podomatic.com 


http://nakforcooking.blogspot.com is the web address where you can find more from our awesome special guest chef Nicole. On tonight's episode Nicole teaches Thor, Baldr, and Loki how to make buttermilk biscuits and how to make butter, both from scratch. It gets pretty epic. Learn more about how to cook things at Nicole's aforementioned awesome website: http://nakforcooking.blogspot.com

( Also file under: Volume 1: Episode 1 of: Episodes that will actually teach you something)

Here (from wiki) is a more detailed explanation of the origin of Alcohol proof, if you are interested: "In the 18th century and until 1 January 1980, the United Kingdom defined alcohol content in terms of “proof spirit”, which was defined as the most dilute spirit that would sustain combustion of gunpowder.[1] The term originated in the 18th century, when payments to British sailors included rations of rum. To ensure that the rum had not been watered down, it was “proved” by dousing gunpowder in it, then tested to see if the gunpowder would ignite. If it did not, then the rum contained too much water and was considered to be “under proof”. It was found that gunpowder would not burn in rum that contained less than 57.15% abv. Therefore, rum that contained this percentage of alcohol was defined to have "100 degrees proof". "
via http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alcohol_proof#History

Here is the recipe for both items so you can cook along at home:

Butter

Ingredients:

- Heavy cream

- One liquid-tight jar

Directions:

1) Pour heavy cream into jar, making sure that you do not fill the jar more than ½ full. The cream needs room to expand.

2) Put the lid on the jar and shake. This will take a while.

3) The cream will eventually stop sloshing around. This is the whipped cream stage. It will feel like you are accomplishing nothing, but keep going…you’re almost there.

4) Eventually, the whipped cream will suddenly separate into a yellow mass floating in a white, watery liquid. The yellow is butter, the white is buttermilk.

5) Pour off the buttermilk to save for baking.

6) Add some water to the jar with the butter and shake. Pour off the water and repeat a few times. This rinses the buttermilk out of the butter.



Southern Buttermilk Biscuits

recipe via: http://www.food.com/recipe/southern-buttermilk-biscuits-26110

Ingredients:

- 2 cups all-purpose flour

- ¼ teaspoon baking soda

- 1 tablespoon baking powder

- 1 tsp salt

- 6 tbsp unsalted butter, very cold

- approx. 1 cup buttermilk

Directions:

1) Preheat oven to 450°F

2) Combine dry ingredients in a bowl.

3) Cut butter into the flour (or use a food processor). It should resemble coarse meal.

4) Add the buttermilk and mix until just combined. If the dough looks a little dry, add some more buttermilk. DON’T OVERWORK THE DOUGH.

5) Flour a board or clean surface, and turn the dough out onto it.

6) Gently pat the dough until ½” thick. Fold about 5 or so times, then pat until 1” thick.

7) Use a round cutter (or a round glass) to cut the biscuits.

8) Place the biscuits on a prepared cookie sheet – sides touching for soft sides, or 1” apart for crispy sides.

9) Bake for 10-12 minutes. Look for a light golden brown color.

This week's photo is via: http://letsfightcrime.com/2010/07/21/poppy-poppy-popcorn-shrimpies/
(I thought it was important to note that the photo was originally titled "BorkBorkBork.jpg" 'cause that is pretty cool.)