Thursday, April 28, 2011

If you like naked well muscled men, have you thought about buying an Acura automobile?

This ad is really well shot, and I really like the music. It would make a great ad for Men's Warehouse. I don't think it is a very good car ad though, since the impression it leaves you with is, "Damn Calvin Johnson is really good looking." When it should be making you think, "Damn that Acura is really good looking."

Maybe They are trying to subtly suggest that if you buy this car you will have a better shot at getting Calvin Johnson to have sex with you.

Actually, that is probably a decent marketing strategy.

Acura has a second ad with this same format featuring sexy lady Olympic snow boarder Ashleigh Mcivor:

This ad just made me realize I find Ashleigh Mcivor hotter when she is wearing snowboard regalia.

So sexy I don't care that she killed a defenseless Yeti and is wearing his feet as shoes

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Podcast Episode 12

Thor's Hour of Thunder: Episode 12: The Menace of the Land-Sea Beasts

This week we discuss: X-files Series finale, David Duchovny's sex life, The Red Shoe Diaries, Blues Brothers 2000, John Belushi, Hardcore Pornography, Dan Aykroyd, Agent Cody Banks, Anthony Anderson's filmography, Ken Burns, Why the voice of Morgan Freeman makes everything classier, Farce of the Penguins, Bob Saget Stephen Fry, Alan Davies, QI, Quite Interesting, how to win at Rock Paper Scissors, Disney Nature Documentries, African Cats, Hanna, Samuel L Jackson, Samuel L Jackson narrating nature documentaries, Lies in Walt Disney Told you. And as usual: many many more things which I'm too lazy to write down,

Karen Gillan on Criag Ferguson.

In the past I have apologized for posting items unrelated to advertising. I will be doing nothing of the sort for this post. This post also has nothing to do with advertising, but it contains a video of one of 21st century "Doctor Who"'s more awesome companions* on the best chat show on network T.V.** So I'm not gonna make any excuses for it being off topic. I think Craig is at his funniest when he is talking to other people from Scotland OR talking to women he is clearly finds gorgeous and this interview contains all that plus doctor who references.

To summarize: This is awesome. Watch this. If you have already seen this interview, watch it again.

Friday, April 22, 2011

No, I will never stop doing posts about the Old Spice Guy. OR: "the man your man could smell like" ad update part 2319.

I had seen that Old Spice had some new ads in their Man Your Man Could Smell Like campaign. I hadn't mentioned these ads on the blog yet, because I have already made my love of these commercials known on many many many occasions, and didn't feel like I had much new to say about the newest ads in this continually awesome and well executed series.

I however just discovered that Old Spice did a pretty amazing making of for one of these ads. Old Spice posted it back in March, but I only became aware of its existence today, so I thought I would be remiss if I didn't share its awesomeness with you. (yes, you personally, everyone else who reads this blog can fuck off.*)

Here is the commercial itself:

...and here is how they did it: The first 1:15 is the actual making of, and is really incredible, I wouldn't have guessed half of the transitions they used, its a really good example of how camera placement changes the viewers perception of a scene. The remaining 2 minutes of the video are interviews with the writers and with Isaiah Mustafa, whom I have already established I enjoy watching do anything. Including reciting the script from the first commercial verbatim on Ellen's talk show.

Mustafa's answer to his favorite part about the Old Spice ad at 1:15 is pretty fantastic.


*I discovered while finding my old Old Spice posts to link here that I made this same joke back in August while discussing the 2nd series of Old Spice ads.  I assume if Old Spice is still making ads with Isaiah Mustafa six months from now, I will again make a joke about talking specifically to you, dear reader. I guess the way Mustafa directly addresses the audience makes me pine to interact with my readers more intimately. I guess a better word choice there would have been "personally", or a more honest choice of words would have been "sexually".

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Podcast Episode 11

 Thor's Hour of Thunder: Episode 11: The Doom From Dimension Aqua

This week these things happen: Rollercoaster, George Segal, Clockwork men, Kris Kristofferson, Fire Down Below, Stephen Segal, Environmentalist action movies, Executive Decision, Thor, New thor movie, Kenneth Branagh, Natalie Portman, whoever that dude is who plays thor, Chris Hemsworth, Justice League of America, Construction Cranes, Ecuador, Family Guy, Super friends, Blade 2, The Onion, Dexter, Guillermo del Toro, Quiqueg, X-files, Dana Scully, Lock Ness Monster, Hellboy 2: The Golden Army, Doctor Who, Dr. Who, Daleks, Dalek, Matt Smith, David Tennant, Russell T Davies, stephen moffat, Christopher Eccleston, The Good Guys, Colin Hanks, Bradley Whitford, Hugh Laurie, House.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

George Fucking Parros

George Parros: No helmet can contain his mane.

I'll be the first to admit this post doesn't have a damn thing to do with advertising. In the past when I've wanted to talk about the other things I read too much about such as hockey or cars  or movies, I've been able to tie it into a commercial.

That's not the case this time. I could try to justify this post as being some kind of extension of Tough Guy Month-(remember Tough Guy Month on this blog? That was rad. I should think of a theme for month of May. Comment with any suggestions. Maybe Booze month, folks seem to like it when I talk about booze ads here, and I know I like to write those articles. Anyway, I should probably get this paragraph back on track)-but the truth is I just think George Parros is fucking awesome and with the Stanley Cup Playoffs upon us, I wanted to mention the reasons for my opinion.

I started following the Anaheim Ducks because I thought it was so cool that Scott Niedermayer requested to be traded to the Ducks when they sucked and still dressed like cartoon characters, (away from 3 time cup winners the Jersey Devils) because as great as it was for him to win the Cup, he wanted to win it with his younger brother as a teammate before he retired.*

Now that Niedermayer has retired, my favorite player on the 2011 Ducks is easily George Parros. Feel free to argue this in the comments section, but I would probably rank Parros as tied with Duncan Keith for most all-around hardcore badass in the current NHL.

Parros is supposedly a forward, but he had as many assists in the 2009-2010 NHL season as I personally did, but that doesn't matter because that is not his job. His job is to punch things, he regularly leads the Ducks in penalty minutes and fighting majors.

Parros is pretty much a real life "Chuck Norris facts".  He has racked 694 career penalty minutes in 289 games. He only cuts his hair once a year, and gives all the hair from his yearly haircut to charity. He mustache is so famous that he sells official George Parros fake mustaches at the Ducks' shop at the Honda center, and gives the profits to charity. The mustaches are quite popular:
I would like to note this is an real, un-doctored picture of Snoop Dogg wearing a Parros fake mustache over his real mustache.

Parros is very active with charitable causes when he is not punching things. You can buy clothing which supports these charities from his website, which is of course called 'Stache Gear. A name which is extremely appropriate for Mr. Parros, but which would be even more appropriate for a website that sells Tom Selleck** themed clothing.

I am not looking up which charity Parros works with so that I can continue to assume it is one that aims to stop world hunger by punching things. One of the things you can buy on this site to help Parros smash the world's problems in the jaw is this awesome shirt:

Its a bit hard to see in the image provides, but this is a stylized print of a photo of Parros punching someone in the face. The image they went with is probably not my all time favorite picture of Parros punching someone, but it is so hard to decide what photo is, every punch he throws is its own unique snow flake.

This shirt is currently completely sold out on Parros's site, and once it gets reprinted, he can probably sell enough to find the cure for whatever his charity is working towards, because honestly, who doesn't want to have the back of your shirt feature Parros mid-punch. When they get back in stock I am going to ask everyone I know to buy me one for my birthday so I can always have a clean Parros Punch Shirt to wear at all times. (For another fantastic picture of Parros at his day job, scroll down slightly.)

Yeah Parros is getting punched at the particular second this photo is being snapped. But you can see from where his hand is and the face the guy on the Flyers is making that the Flyer just got finished being punched in the face by Parros. Also I love the sweat and grittiness of this shot. The blurs on the left side add to this feel. Also awesome: the ref watching passively from the corner of the frame, like a Roman Emperor witnessing a gladiator battle. (This caption was too long, (and sort of pretentious now that i re-read it.))

So I like Parros because he is a great enforcer and by all accounts nicest guy ever off the ice. But I just found out today he is was recently ranked the fourth smartest pro athlete in North America by the Sporting News.

This article is already becoming way too much of a Parros fan zine, so I won't go into the any details on Parros' genius-ness, but you can read more about Parros being both harder and smarter than you on in Sporting News's terribly formatted article.

*Scott's younger brother is Rob Niedermayer. Rob has had a shitty last couple of years, getting traded around the league and playing 3 games this season with his (admittedly complicated) name misspelled on his own jersey.  But hopefully things are on the upswing for him. Rob currently is gearing up for a leadership role with the Buffalo Sabres for their playoff run. He is the only member of the team to have already won a Stanley Cup, and the Sabres are hoping he can provide a level head and insight for a city which has never had a championship season for either of its major league sports teams. (Though the Buffalo Bills do have the dubious distinction of being the NFL team to loose the most Superbowls in the 1990's. (I say this as a fan.))

**Selleck had one of my favorite skits as part of Conan O'Brien's long running bit "Celebrity Secrets."  I can't find Selleck's skit anywhere on the internet, so you can consider this transcript of Selleck's dialogue from this Conan bit from 10 years an StrictlyCommercials exclusive.

Most blogs try to get exclusives where they are the first to know about things. I prefer to have exclusive content by being the last to remember the details about something stupid. Here is a different one of Conan's "Celebrity Secrets" sketches so you can see the format. Then join me after the video for the dialogue from Selleck's skit.

Selleck's take on this went as follows:

Tom Selleck: When I received the script to the film Three Men and a Little Lady I signed up for the film immediately. For one reason: I never learned how to read.

Here are few more bonus clips of that skit from Conan, because it makes me entirely too happy:

Patrick Stewart:

(There was a video of Patrick Stewart here, but I couldn't find a version that wouldn't autoplay as soon as you arrived at my website. This was confusing and annoying, So I've taken it out. However, I still think it is a funny video, so when you are ready to watch it and have it auto play CLICK THESE WORDS RIGHT HERE and you will go to the site I found it on.)

I missed you while you are on that other site. Promise you will never leave again?

I have no idea what language those captions at the bottom are in, but they kind of fit the basement setting. It makes it look like Stewart was interrogated by the Soviets and then his responses were translated for the Stasi. Or since the number of umlauts and vowels in the captions make them look much more like some kind of parody of a Scandinavian language instead of German, perhaps the captions are written specifically for the Swedish Chef.

John Tesh:

I love the "T.E.S.H." acronym joke. It didn't get a big laugh from the audience, but I still remember that joke from when I first saw that sketch eight or so odd years ago. Maybe all that proves is that I have terrible taste in humor. This blog would be evidence towards that.

Friday, April 8, 2011

This Thor Poster is Simply Fantastic

Empire Magazine has a page every month where they have graphic designer Olly Moss create a minimalistic illustrated poster for an upcoming film. I've often looked at this and longed for studios to be brave enough to hire Moss to design their actual marketing material, instead of going with the usual actors heads photoshopped into the sky crap that is the norm these days in movie marketing.

Marvel decided to answer my prayers and hired Moss to promote the upcoming Thor film. Here is the awesome poster he created:

Some of its elements seem to be a direct homage to the poster for the 1959 film Anatomy of a Murder. Which is  a pretty random source.

I haven't seen Anatomy of a Murder since I was in my early teens, but I remember it being a pretty weak film, with a labored pace and no one to really root for in it. I considered it a waste of talent having Jimmy Stewart, George C. Scott, and Orson Bean in it. The best thing about the film, at least to my 14 year old self, was its spectacular poster and the fantastic score by the great Duke Ellington.

So its nice to see elements of the poster referenced in this Thor poster. Maybe we will get really lucky and director Kenneth Branagh will also have the film's entire score be comprised of Duke Ellington music. While we are at it, could we have Natalie Portman do a George C. Scott impression the whole movie? No? That would be stupid? What about having Anthony Hopkins do a Jimmy Stewart impression then? Man, I would pay good money to see Hopkins do a Jimmy Stewart impression, preferably while reading the entire script to Harvey.

I love everything about this picture. I'm not sure why I don't end every post with this image.

This is how you make an ad to sell a "GroupOn" type service:

GroupOn last week fired the ad agency who created the now infamous ad which conveyed a message to the 100 million Americans watching the Super Bowl that GroupOn thinks the plight of the Tibetans is fucking hilarious.

(GroupOn actually does a lot of charity efforts, read my post from back in February for why I think this ad was really badly executed. Or read my follow up post. Yes I've covered it a lot, almost as much as the man your man could smell like from old spice. A company dropping an ad campaign they spent tens of millions of dollars on is big news around this parts.)

So the latest was GroupOn fired the agency responsible and made a public statement distancing themselves form the agency. (I believe GroupOn's statement was: "Everyone at this ad agency are a bunch of assholes." [citation needed]*) See the Ad Age article here if you are interested in the actual facts.

Roger Ebert once said the best way to critique a film is to make a better one.** And in the case of GroupOn style deal sites, someone had already made a much better ad for another deal of the day/ social buying website. To this end I offer to GroupOn's dumped agency this awesome ad:

This ad does a much better job of showing the viewer the wide variety of things one can save on by using the site, and it still conveys this information in a humorous and stylized way.

I love the clever props they use for this ad. My favorite part is the man dressed in red who spins the couple at the end. Using Michel Gondryesque props and traditional live theater techniques really give this ad a lot of heart and humor, as well as an eye catching look.

Major props to Ken for sending me the Ad Age article and suggesting pretty much every topic I covered in this post.


*I stole that citation needed gag from
**I think ebert was quoting someone else when he said this, but I read it in his book "Your Movie Sucks" and I don't feel like looking up who he was quoting.

"Television is better when Norm MacDonald is on it." -Jon Stewart

I'm excited Norm MacDonald has a new T.V. starting next week. This promo for it is simple but quite funny:

Podcast Episode 10- UPDATED!

Thor's 10: In the Clutches of the God-Eater!

You only get a certain number of megabytes on podomatic, which is why I have to take down an old episode of Thor's whenever I put a new one up.

Due to popular demand I'm gonna start to slowly put old episodes back up using this new second RSS feed.

This episode was the most popular of the "Lost" Episodes, hence why it is going up first.

Which episode of the old ones do you want me to put back up next? (Check out the episode descriptions which are all still available )
write in to HourOfThunder (at) gmail or call 754-444-THOR and let the Pantheon know.

Greetings from Thor, Baldr, and Mr. Johnny Cash

ORIGINAL EPISODE DESCRIPTION: From Friday April 8th, 2011:

This week we discuss: Burt Reynolds; The Fact that Burt Reynolds has a museum in Jupiter Florida; The Mystery Files of Shelby Woo, The Secret World of Alex Mac; Dom Deluise; Hal Needham; How you can get an official shirt that says "Academy Award Nominee"; King of Kong; Competitive Tetris; Charles Nelson Reilly; Cannonball Run, Smokey and the Bandit, Bret Summers; How to succeed in bussiness without really trying. Daniel Radcliff. Daniel Radcliff's penis: live and in person. Julie Andrews, My Fair Lady, Mary Poppins, Audrey Hepburn. Mad Max. The Road Warrior. Mad Max 3: Beyond Thunderdome. Indiana Jones. Temple of Doom. Raiders of the Lost Ark. Last Crusade.

And more stuff too, but I don't feel like re-listening to the whole thing to remember the rest.

This is the best movie trailer I have seen in years, or at least the most metal.

Ridiculously talented actor Joseph Gordon-Levitt has a movie coming out on may 11th called Hesher. It has some truly epic promotional materials.

This is what its poster looks like:

Here the films trailer. Watch in awe as it punches awesome directly into your face:

Admittedly after viewing both these pieces of promotional material, I still know very little about the plot of this film. But it doesn't matter. This, my friends, is how you generate hype for a movie.

In terms of what the actual plot of this movie is though, described it thusly: "he drives around in a van with a small child, making obscene jokes, listening to metal, and lighting everything on fire."

In which case, the trailer seems pretty accurate actually.

(Via Filmdrunk.)

Monday, April 4, 2011

Here be dragons!

Graffitti seen in the hallway of a basement if a hotel while  waiting to enter a one night only traveling roller disco rink.
I am aware that nothing in previous sentene makes sense or seems to go together.
(sent via cell phone)

Come to norway and ride your bike right off a cliff!

(sent via cell phone)